Legacies

We were never expecting Sarah would marry or have children (although she definitely had a way of surprising us) but now that she’s gone, our line ends here. There are multiple grandchildren and even great-grandchildren on both sides of our family so it’s not as if our families will stop existing.

Max and I are both the youngest child in our families. He grew up in a big family, with almost everyone in the same city, Philadelphia, and everybody going “down the Shore” together every summer to the South Jersey Shore. I grew up in a small family with my relatives all in other cities and we moved several times. Sarah was the last grandbaby in both of our families, and in Max’s family, a couple of great-grandbabies slipped in the door before her.

I loved Max’s extended, large family. Huge numbers of cousins, aunts, uncles made every wedding and family gathering so much fun. Max’s mom was warm, loving, and caring. She always was happy to see us when we took the train up to Philly from DC. She had a personality very much like Sarah: warm, affable, accepting. Unfortunately, she died when I was 5 months pregnant with Sarah from a heart condition. After Jeannette’s death, the family fell apart a little bit. Max’s brothers did not want to get together for Thanksgiving or other holidays. We had an infant and didn’t travel so much. I guess all families change.

Okay, I feel myself wanting to break into “Time In A Bottle” here by Jim Croce. Please know that I really was thinking that I was feeling much better today in comparison to last week.

I guess I’ve been wondering a lot lately about what makes your children your legacy? I think the best conclusion I can come to is that they keep the memories of you alive, at least for a time. It’s not the worst thing that could happen to me, being forgotten or not really remembered in peoples’ memories. I’m okay with that. I’m okay with our photos being the ones that future family members say “That’s…that’s….oh wait… no let me think…” As long as they can see the love the three of us shared.