Tag: child loss

For the Present

Just when I thought it was safe to look at Google News again, Psychology Today zapped me with another one of its helpful articles from Mark Travers, Ph.D. This one is about how to handle my catastrophic thinking. Mark explains that catastrophizing is distorted thinking or a malfunctioning thought process. I’m certainly with you there,… Continue reading For the Present

Flirting With Disaster

I woke up screaming again this morning at around 3:30. I really feel bad for my husband at this point, as this is the third time in the last couple of weeks he has been awakened by my shrieking “You f&%ing a$$h#le” or words to that effect. I hope he’s not getting a complex. I… Continue reading Flirting With Disaster

Trips

One week from today will be March 1. February has been a hard month in so many ways and I do want it to pass away. And in March, Max and I will take a trip to the UK. We haven’t really traveled other than long weekends at the Jersey Shore, our Wish Trip in… Continue reading Trips

Maladaptive Behavior

This morning Google News sent me a Psychology Today article letting me know that there are 3 Ways My Personality Might Be Secretly Harming Me. (Only 3?) It seems, according to Mark Travers, Ph.D., that we all need to “check in” with ourselves regularly to avoid slipping into maladaptive behavioral patterns, although Mark does not… Continue reading Maladaptive Behavior

Where is Sarah?

This morning I woke very early from a dream in which I think I was hunting for Sarah but happened upon my mother, who also died recently. I wanted information from Mom on Sarah’s whereabouts, but she began a long spiel about her medical problems, which is what usually happened when you talked to her… Continue reading Where is Sarah?

Deep winter thoughts

I’m not in a good place this morning. That business about letting go of resentment that I wrote about a few days ago seems to have come back to mock me. I have finally gotten around to watching a webcast of a seminar at National Institutes of Health last spring, ‘De Novo SPG4 Inaugural Symposium.’… Continue reading Deep winter thoughts

Childless

This is Presidents Day weekend, Sarah’s birthday weekend. We are planning to go out to dinner on Sunday with Sarah’s tutor, who we were all close to, but have vague “we’ll do something” plans for Monday. Perhaps I will get a pedicure with purple or pink polish. This morning I read a BBC News article… Continue reading Childless

Untitled

These last few days my usual emotional repertoire since August 18 of guilt, depression, angst, and constant tearfulness seems different. A couple of nights ago, I woke up from a dream screaming. I remember that someone was trying to steal the new car I bought in place of our wheelchair van, and leave me three… Continue reading Untitled

True Facts

Little kids, and sometimes adults too, used to come up to me and ask me “What’s wrong with her?” when I was out and about with Sarah. I don’t blame kids for having questions but there was never any good answer and I sucked at handling this situation. Sarah understood everything that was said around… Continue reading True Facts